In the event of a water landing your life jacket can also be used as a diaper. And remember – this is a non-smoking flight. Thanks for your cooperation.
PS – You’re too sexy for your hat… too sexy for your hat – whatcha think about that?
Two questions: Between the 3 of you – who’s junk was bigger? And were they from Craig’s List?
You take pictures of other dudes tattoos.
You wear a “doo” rag that matches your wife’s shirt.
Got a lovely email from one of Care Bears friends…
“starshines matching mexican illegal immigrant who is married and already has one divorce under the belt. she claims to be a “house mom” at jags, but just because you do a strippers make up then go on stage after her, doesnt make you a house mom it makes you a stripper…at least you’re a giving stripper.”
Tip of the day to all “Jags” strippers: Suck in the pooch, and don’t let a clown do your make up.
Ok, I know I’ve been gone for a little while and all that – but we’ll get to that shortly. First things first… Happy May 16th Birthday to Megan Fox.
Someone stole an ’89 Ford Probe. Couple questions. 1) Why does someone still own a Ford Probe? 2) Why would you report this stolen? They did you a favor. Go buy a 2002 Kia and upgrade. 3) Why would you steal an ’89 Ford Probe? You couldn’t find a nice ’96 Civic with a 7 foot wing on the back and a hispanic name written in Old English on the back window? Let’s face it Mr. Car Thief – you’re just not looking hard enough.
Cover charge for entrance to Vegas night club: $50
Bottle Service for 6 people: $2000
Getting to hammered that security wheels you incoherently out of the club in a wheel chair: PRICELESS!!!!
Or in a country with socialized healthcare. Oh wait….
Anyway – Tiger Woods will return to putting his balls in holes in April at the Masters [Augusta National].
“The Masters is where I won my first major and I view this tournament with great respect. After a long and necessary time away from the game, I feel like I’m ready to start my season at Augusta.” – Tiger Woods
He closed his statements by adding “Do I make you horny baby?! Do I make you randy, yeaaahhh!!”
Searching for SF [race not relevant - but "more to love" is required]. To enjoy – long walks in Wal-Mart, home improvement projects, KFC and/or Dairy Queen, and NASCAR.
Offering a life time of love, poor hygiene, cheap beer, poor bodily functionality, excess gas, and perfect attendance at random festivals.
If you got love rolls – Let me hear from ya!
“Sweet Greg-O” – OUT!
